Mothers are for.........

Mothers are for loving you

If you're good or bad.

Mothers are for sharing

Whatever makes you glad.

Mothers are for laughing

At your favorite jokes.

Mothers are for helping you

Get along with folks.

Mothers are for reading

Stories old and new.

Mothers are for teaching you

To always be kind and true.

Mothers are for watching

When you give a play.

Mothers are for clapping

In a happy sort of way.

Mothers are for loving

When you snuggle up so tight.

Mothers are for hugging you

With a sweet good night.

Nduka Enemchukwu . (copyright) May 1994.

Back in 1994, precisely twelve years ago, a few days to mother's day, my son's fifth grade teacher sent home a large envelope with him addressed to me. Being a good student and a good boy overall,Iwas'nt worried about the contents of the envelope. A note inside read it : Dear Mrs Enemchukwu, I thought you may want to keep this, since it's so special, I laminated it for you". I pulled out an 8x10 laminated pink poster paper with a poem on it. The title was " Mothers are for....... and signed and dated by my son Nduka Enemchukwu . He stood there in anticipation, so I read the poem and pulled him close and gave him a big hug for writing such a sweet poem specially for me. I put it away in my scrap book where I put awards or such things from school or sporting events.With our hectic schedule, there was no time for dwelling on the poem at the time.A typical day started with my return from work in the morning and the house buzzing with before school activities. The children would be almost halfway through getting ready for school by the time I get home and we hurry and get everyone out the door and see the bicycle riders off and I take the car riders and the baby to get in the the drop- off line before it becomes too long. Some days the line would be so long that I am usually able to get a good ten to fifteen minute cat nap before it is our turn to drop off. The two year old and I would then hurry home, bathe east breakfast and then proceed totidy up the house quickly . He looked foward to our time together because he had me all to himslf. After breakfast, we would watch for Sesame Street and other of his favorite children's program before we go to sleep. On good days he would let me get up to three hours of sleep, on bad days or when he was sick, it would be off and on cat naps on the couch in between watching Tv, playing or just trying to get over an ear infection or another uncorfortable problem. If I fell asleep in the middle of his favorite show, he would gently try to wake me up for the laughs. Then it's time for afterschool pick ups. First, the three bicycle riders arrive, full of ennrgy and excitement and stories to tell. The pick up line for the two car riders was usually long by the time I got there and the girls were tired and quiet on the ride home after standing in the blazing Florida sun wiating for their turn to be picked up. The evenings were usually spent at practice for Tennis, Basketball, Cross country depending on which sporting event they were involved in at the time. If there was no practice , they played in the yard and usually took the little one and I would manage another hour or two of sleep before homework, dinner and off to work. Even during the week end and Summer, when school was out, getting adequate sleep was a big challenge. Sports practice, YMCA swimming lessons, Tennis tournaments whch sometime took us to Tampa or Fort Lauderdale, Florida kept us on our toes. A few neighbors and friends from church whose children were in the same program, helped out once in a while and gave rides to my children allowing me time to sleep before working the night shift. Two occasions come to mind when I absolutely thought I would lose my mind. The two-year old had surgery, an out patient event that requred us to be at the hospital by seven thirty in the morning. Having no vacation time left, I pleaded with my supervisor to let me bring him to work with me so we could leave from work to his appointment in the morning. My request was granted and I took him to work which made him very happy. Being in an unfamiliar environment, it was difficult for him to settle down and sleep and he kapt demanding something to drink which I could'nt give him becasue he was NPO and was not allowed to eat or drink anything. Calming him down while trying to do my work was a big challenge.We went straight to the hospital from work, about a thirty minute drive and were almost late when we got there, despite the fact that my relief came in early so I could leave. They quickly prepped him and took him to the operating room. I fell asleep in the waiting room and the nurse woke me up when the surgery was over and asked that I come and stay with him in the recovery room. They knew I had worked the night before and gave me a recliner. We slept side by side while the nurses watched us like we were both in recovery. When he came to, they woke me up to hold him because he was crying for pain. They gave him some pain medication and we hung around for another two hours before they discharged us with instructuions and an appoitment slip for follow up.We drove home uneventfully but trouble started when we got home and the little gellow could'nt do all the things he used to do. He got frustrated and cried at the drop of a pin. Carrying him on my back with a wrapper used to work wonders because he enjoyed it, stayed out of trouble and usually fell asleep in no time. This time, I could'nt carry him because of his surgical wound so it was cranky town for the next few days.He cried if any of his siblings approached or touched him. Two days, I called in sick, then I took him to work with me for about three days. We were both relived when his wound healed and he could move around again and do things for himself.Another hairy situation arose one day as I was cooking one hot summer day. Having been raised on beans, I continue to enjoy beans to this day, especially lentils and black beans. They have less carbohydrate and do not cause as much bloating as the black eye beans. I would cook beans (beanse) as my children called it trying to mimmick Nigerians, and serve it with rice and stew or with plantain. Every one enjoyed it. It usally took just a few minutes to cook the beans in a pressure cooker. Even when we made Chili from scatch, we cooked the Kidney beans with the pressure cooker which leaves the beans soft and intact and not mushy as the children describe over cooked food.On that fateful day, we had come back from a morning of tennis practice and every one was exhausted and staying inside, away from the blazing heat. I started dinner early so we can eat and relax a little bit before it was time for work. I started rice in one pot, made stew and then started the beans in the pressure cooker. I sat down on the couch and fell asleep. Then I saw little people jumping up and down in front of me poiting to the kitchen and saying something. I thought I was dreaming. When I finally woke up, I realized something was going on in the kitchen. My children always tease me for burning food because I fell asleep on the couch. They had no idea how to handle this particular situation and I am happy they did'nt try.The loud whistling and hissing of the pressure cooker made me run to the kitchen. I was confused by what I saw. I stood there for a minute trying to figure out how to tackle the problem and the children kept yelling" Mom do something , do something. So I ran towrds the stove to turn off it off. The pressure cooker had blown its top and was sending a steady stream of hot liquid to the ceiling and the hot liquid was raining on the kitchen floor. I slipped on the thick liquid on the floor and landed sitting squarley in it while more rained on my head. I tried to get up, slipped and fell again. My children were dying with laughter and trying so hard to conceal it. Desperate to do something quickly, I crawled on all fours to the stove, reached up and turned it off. The whistling finally subsided and the upward spray stopped. By this time we were all rolling on the floor laughing. I was dripping with bean broth , in my hair, on my arms, on my face. The children kept apologising for laughing at me but it was so funny they could,nt help it. Funny, not really, that pot could have exploded or blown a hole in the ceiling. I never used a pressure cooker again since that close call.The years went by really fast and middle school and high school breezed by and college is also becoming history and sometimes I wonder where the years went.A few days ago, while putting away Aj's High school graduation notice in my scrap book,a pink laminted poster paper fell out and I picked it up and read it and it was the peom from long ago. For the first time,I noticed the rhyme, the thoughtfulness and the simple things that mattered to a ten year old and I was touched. No wonder the teacher laminated it and sent it to me to personally. I called the poet and asked him if he remembered the mother's day peom he wrote for me in fifth grade. " I wrote so many poems in those days Mom" he responded and I remember clearly the little notes he would bring home and I will show my appreciation and just put them aside on the table on night stand. I asked hime if I could share this special poem since he had signed and dated it. He was laughing at how seriously I was taking the copyright issue. I insisted that he copyright it before mother's day and he promised to do just that. With that I felt I had the freedom to share this special poem from a ten year old, now twenty two who thinks the world of his mother and the little things she did and does. My prayer is that he will one day be blessed with that special someone, who will think the world of him and who he will adore as he adores his mother

.To all the single Moms out there, pulling double duty to give their children a normal life, and to all the Dads who are filling Mom's shoes because Mom is winning the bread and is too busy or Mom is simply out to left field, this Poem is for you.

The power of words, and then choices.

By Chinwe Amala Enemchukwu.

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits."

It is a wonderful thing to know that words are exactly what they are---words; which come out and then evaporate and go with the breeze. Spoken word, that is, will come out and then fade away. Written words can equally be erased or discarded. People hearing or reading words can use words anyway they choose to, take them to heart and react accordingly, or hear them and no matter how bad they are, make a decision even though difficult, to have total control over their reaction to those words.

Painful words, especially when laced with lies can cut as sharp as a knife and inflict such pain. Painful words have driven people to end their lives, to take another person's live or just to go through life feeling less than what God designed them to be. Painful words can kill a human spirit.
Painful words spoken in a competitive setting as in a debate or campaign are best put aside with a handshake at the end of the exercise and left right there.
Rising up above hurtful words and lies which are meant to cut down is a difficult task which if, and when mastered, is an art that brings great joy and peace. The task starts with learning to know and love who one is. Armed with the knowledge that people are made in the image of God and the knowledge that God is not in the business of making garbage or useless creations, it becomes easier to start learning how to take those fiery arrows of hurtful words, lies and half truths in stride. It may be weighing the heart down, with tears stinging the eyes, but as soon as one remembers that whoever is saying or writing these words is not even in control of the air that goes in and out of them to make those words possible, the impact of the arrows start fading away instantly. It starts making it clear that those words may actually be the outlet for inner turmoil and pressure for the speaker or writer. Looking at it that way puts the hearer in a position to switch from being a victim to being a person who extends pity and compassion to the speaker. Blessed are the merciful---- for they shall obtain mercy and the mercy works wonders, wiping off the pain and replacing it with fulfillment and joy and appreciation of God's gifts many of which are taken for granted.

A person who just received the bad news that they may not live to the end of the year will not mind hearing a few bad painful words if that will change their bleak situation. Putting words in their right place, in the air, helps blow them away and if written words, read and erase off the mind and dwell on blessings all around, counting them; good health, sight, hearing, the ability to walk, children, family, to mention a few. In other words, blessings wipe away the impact of hateful words.

Words are powerful. Words can do so many different things. They can edify. They can diminish. Words can unite. They can disperse. Bad, hurtful words have the tendency to destroy but we as humans with the ability to CHOOSE can choose the way we react to words, which includes rising above bad words, trying to put into consideration the speaker of the words and what drives a person to speak or write hurtful words. The focus becomes the source of the words. The best thing becomes to make the choice to let the speaker of the hurtful words off the hook completely. That gets rid of garbage and baggage which can weigh down a person in an unbelievable manner. Such garbage can hold down a person, preventing progress, preventing happiness, stealing peace and fulfillment.

The best thing to do then becomes to choose to let words be just what they are---Words. In one way, out the other.
This Thanksgiving, I am very thankful for the ability to let words be just words and nothing more. God's word never changes and that makes all the difference in the world. Man's words on the other hand, as powerful as they may be are not carved in stone, will not necessarily have real power, unless we let them.

Novenber 2008.

SATURATED FATS, UNSATURATED FATS, TRANS FATS,COOKING OILS and the rest of the Abacha ncha story.

NOVEMBER 15 2008.
SATURATED/UNSATURATED FATS, COOKING OILS, TRANS FATS

A CONTINUATION--And-- CONCLUSION.

Saturated fat and Unsaturated fat are the two main categories of fats that appear in foods. Saturated fat is distinguished from unsaturated fat in that there are no double bonds between carbon atoms in its chemical makeup, so that the fatty acids are saturated with hydrogen.Naturally occurring saturated fat, such as the fat found in animal-based foods, and a few plants namely Palm oil and Coconut oil congeal when cool, while naturally occurring unsaturated fat, such as olive oil, remains fluid.An unsaturated fat is a fat or fatty acid in which there are one or more double bonds in the fatty acid chain. A fat molecule is monounsaturated if it contains one double bond, and polyunsaturated if it contains more than one double bond. Where double bonds are formed,hydrogen atoms are removed,--Thus, a saturated fat is "saturated" with hydrogen atoms.In cellular metabolism hydrogen-carbon bonds are broken down - or oxidized - to produce energy, thus an unsaturated fat molecule contains less energy (i.e fewer calories) than a comparable sized saturated fat.Also, the greater the degree of unsaturation in a fatty acid, the more vulnerable it is to (rancidity (spoiling). That means that saturated fatty acids last longer than unsaturated fatty acids. An oil with saturated fatty acids (palm oil, Coconut oil) will have longer shelf life than an oil with monounsaturated fatty acid (Olive,Peanut,canola),which will in turn have longer shelf life than an oil with polyunsaturated fatty acid (Sunflower,Corn,Safflower, Soy oil ).Saturated fats can become solids (congeal) at room temperature while unsaturated fats are liquid at room temperature. Saturated fat is less likely to spoil than Unsaturated fat.Saturated fats give an unhealthy boost to cholesterol levels while unsaturated fats don't.Saturated fats come from mostly animal sources with the few exceptions already mentioned( palm and coconut oils.) If your cholesterol levels are alright and you live a healthy lifestyle, you don't have to worry too much about these oils.When unsaturated fats are "hydrogenated"--- hydrogen added, ( they become solidified so they resemble butter at room temperature) Examples are margarine and trans fats. That's why butter which is from animal source and has saturated fat is not really worse than margarine, which is from plant source but at the same time, the unsaturated fat has been hydrogenated making it like saturated fat and is now in solid form and equally as bad. They continue to raise cholesterol levels like butter and also they lower the good lipoprotein(HDL) which carries good cholesterol.

To avoid confusing people, the recommendation is as follows:For healthy people who have normal cholesterol and triglyceride levels, who are active and eat a balanced diet, you can use any oil you like, to moderation. Avoid rancid (spoilt oil).
For people with cholesterol and triglyceride problems and cardiovascular disease , avoid oils with saturated fats and also hydrogenated unsaturated fats. These will make matters worse, will actually boost your cholesterol levels. Best choices are Olive, peanut or Canola oil
( monounsaturated) Do not use peanut (groundnut oil) if you are allergic to peanuts.

Despite all the bad rap palm oil receives, it remains a very good oil with a lot going for it. Yes, it has saturated fatty acids but it also contains many potent antioxidants, including beta-carotene, pro-vitamin A carotenoids and tocotreinols, a form of vitamin E. These give it the bright red color and rich flavor. If you love palm oil and have no cholesterol and wieght problems, by all means continue to enjoy it, especially in Abacha ncha and as long as you don't use too much of it or use spoilt rancid oil.
Coconut oil has been hailed for it's benefits for the skin, hair, weight loss, increased immunity, stress relief, to mention a few. These benefits of coconut oil can be attributed to the presence of lauric acid, capric acid and caprylic acid, and its properties such as antimicrobial, antioxidant, anti fungal, antibacterial, and emollient.

The Trans-fat story:
When consumers became aware of the drawbacks of saturated fats and started trying to avoid them, food makers made a quick brilliant change. The saturated fats---- palm oil, coconut oil , animal fat were replaced with trans-fats which are actually unsaturated oils to which hydrogen atoms have been added ( hydrogenation) making them like saturated fats like butter, animal fat or solid palm oil, to be used in baked goods and margarine. The baked goods with trans fats also had long shelf lives. On the label, the fat did not show and people were deceived thinking the products were fat-free. It took the Obesity epidemic for this practice to be exposed. Nowdays, the trans fats are also listed on the label.

THINGS TO REMEMBER:
1. When a product is labelled " Cholesterol Free", it may still be loaded with fat.
CHOLESTEROL and FAT are not synonymous ( the same).
Fat is for Energy.
Cholesterol has numerous functions some of which were mentioned in the first part of this write up.
A good example of food with zero cholesterol but plenty of fat is the Avocado, which is cholesterol- free but is still packed with unsaturated fat

Saturated fats tend to cling together and form artery-clogging plaques like cholesterol while unsaturated fats are larger and slide past each other, leaving blood vessels clear. In other words, unsaturated fats will not clog your arteries, but you will still gain weight with too much of them.

CONCLUSION:
The name of the game is using these oils in moderation, and not going over the daily fat requirement in your diet by maintaining a balanced diet and being active, with regular exercise and getting enough sleep.
Being in a good mood also helps keep you healthy. Some Endorphin boosters (endogenous morphine) which your body releases for good mood, makes you feel good, (high ) are hot pepper,( believe it or not), thinking positive thoughts, laughter,exercise, dark chocolate, sunlight -exposure,massage therapy, Orgasm.

Ps: If you have ulcers or are allergic to pepper, then avoid it. Other than that hot pepper in addition to being an endorphin booster, helps clear stuffy noses, and helps in many other ailments---http://www.shirleys-wellness-cafe.com/cayenne.htm

CE

Tryglycerides, Hypertriglyceridemia, Fats and the Abacha ncha story

What are triglycerides?
Triglycerides are the chemical form in which most fat exist in food as well as in the body. They're also present in blood plasma and, in association with cholesterol, form the plasma lipids.Triglycerides in plasma are derived from:
1. fats eaten in foods or,
2. made in the body from other energy sources like carbohydrates.
Calories ingested in a meal and not used immediately by tissues are converted to triglycerides and transported to fat cells to be stored. Hormones regulate the release of triglycerides from fat tissue so they meet the body's needs for energy between meals.

How is an excess of triglycerides harmful?

Excess triglycerides in plasma is called hypertriglyceridemia. It's linked to the occurrence of coronary artery disease in some people. Elevated triglycerides may be a consequence of other disease, such as untreated diabetes mellitus.


American Heart Association Recommendations —

Dietary treatment goals:

Changes in lifestyle habits are the main therapy for hypertriglyceridemia.
These are the changes you need to make:
If you're overweight, cut down on calories to reach your ideal body weight. This includes all sources of calories, from fats, proteins, carbohydrates and alcohol.
Reduce the saturated fat, trans fat and cholesterol content of your diet.
Reduce your intake of alcohol considerably. Even small amounts of alcohol can lead to large changes in plasma triglyceride levels.
Eat fruits, vegetables and nonfat or low-fat dairy products most often.
Get at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity physical activity on five or more days each week.

People with high triglycerides may need to substitute monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats —such as those found in canola oil, olive oil or liquid margarine — for saturated fats ( palm oil,coconut oil animal fat).
Substituting carbohydrates for fats may raise triglyceride levels and may decrease HDL ("good") cholesterol in some people.
Substitute fish high in omega-3 fatty acids for meats high in saturated fat like hamburger.
Because other risk factors for coronary artery disease multiply the hazard from hypertriglyceridemia, control high blood pressure and avoid cigarette smoking.
Even if drugs like statins are used to treat high triglyceride levels (hypertriglyceridemia) dietary management is still important.

It is important to note that fats are essential for life. The body stores away fat for a source of energy reserve. This stored energy is tapped into when the body exerts itself by performing physical activities. Energy is utilized when we do vigourous work such as wood chopping or tedious farm work. The body taps into the fat deposits when such vigorous work is done. Between meals, energy from fat stores is carefully regulated and released by the built in system in the body.

The problems with fat in recent years result from lack of exercise and vigorous activity. Sedentary lifestyle is the norm today and the results in excess fat stores. Vigorous exercise as in bicycling and trecking long distances and activities already mentioned, such as our past generations used to do. Such exercise burns fat and helps eliminate excess fat.

How does Very High Triglycerides affect your health ?

Triglycerides can build up on the walls of certain blood vessels, called arteries.This build-up can make them narrow.Narrowed arteries slow or block blood flow to the heart.Blood brings needed oxygen to the heart. High triglycerides can lead to hardening of your arteries.They can also lead to thickening of your artery walls. This can raise your risk of stroke, heart attack, and heart disease.It can also lead to pancreatitis, an inflammation of the pancreas, a very painful and dangerous condition.Some people might be at greater risk for very high triglycerides because they have other serious health problems like:

High blood pressure
High cholesterol
Obesity.

------To be continued with---

Saturated Fats, Unsaturated (mono and poly unsaturated) Fats, Trans Fats, COOKING OILS and the rest of the Abacha ncha story.

COOKING OILS, FAT, CHOLESTEROL, AND THE REST OF THE (ABACHA NCHA) STORY.

Recently, there were exchanges on this forum on cooking oil, the various kinds, the benefits and drawbacks. Abancha ncha,( an Igbo delicacy made with dry,shredded cassava, lightly rehydrated to leave it crunchy mixed with dried fish, ugba, other delicious ingredients all of which are then tossed in a dressing made with palm oil,water and akanwu), was discussed at length. In addition to palm oil, coconut oil was mentioned.In this article, I intend to shed some light on the FATS which are the problems with some of these oils. Olive oil, canola oil, Soy oil, Sunflower oil, peanut or groundnut oil are some of the other cooking oils. Some fruits we like are high in fats, for example the melon seed we love in Egusi soup. Avocados are high in fat, but not bad for us. There is always a good and a bad side to most things in life. Fats are no exception. Fats are necessary for life. All these will be discussed here.

The general belief is that fats are bad for you. As common as this belief is, it is simply not true. Cholesterol is the most feared of all and because of that, I will start with cholesterol and work to the triglycerides, saturated and unsaturated fats, trans fats and then zero in on cooking oils and where and how they rank.
This article will therefore be in sections which will be put out as time permits.

It is a well known fact that cholesterol is capable of clogging arteries resulting in arteriosclerosis which leads to heart disease, strokes, heart attacks and a variety of other diseases. Cholesterol, despite the above, is very essential to health and living. Up to two thirds of your body's cholesterol is produced in the liver and the intestine. It is a normal constituent of bile. Cholesterol is also found in the brain, adrenal, and nerve fiber sheaths. Cholesterol is very good when it is good cholesterol. Cholesterol functions in these areas:

1. In the skin, cholesterol is converted to essential vitamin D when touched by the ultraviolet rays of the sun.

2. Cholesterol aids in the metabolism of Carbohydrates. When we eat carbohydrates (sugar,glucose) it gets in the cells to produce energy), the excess glucose is converted to glycogen which is then converted to fat and stored.( More details later.) Cholesterol transports fat to cells.The more carbohydrates you eat, the more cholesterol is produced
.
3. Cholesterol is a major supplier of life essential adrenal- steroid hormones such as cortisone.

4. Cholesterol is necessary for the production of male and female sex hormones. It is a component of every membrane.

To be transported around, cholesterol is bound to protein. The differences in the actions of cholesterol depend on the protein to which it is bound. Lipoproteins are the factors in the blood which transport cholesterol.

There are two kinds of Lipoproteins-- --- High Density Lipoproteins (HDL, also known as good cholesterol) and Low Density Lipoprotein (LDL, also known as bad cholesterol). There is also Very Low Density lipoprotein (VLDL) which are the substances the liver needs to produce Low Density lipoproteins.

The various Lipoproteins:

1. The Low Density Lipoproteins (LDL) carry about sixty percent of blood cholesterol and are bad because they deposit cholesterol in arteries , where it joins with other substances to become PLAQUE , the artery blocker (causes stroke, heart attack).

1b.
The Very Low Density Lipoproteins (VLDL) control the amount of LDL produced by the liver. The more of them in the body, the more LDL the liver sends out, the more your chances of having heart disease.
2.
High Density Lipoproteins (HDL) carry about twenty percent of blood cholesterol and is composed of mainly lecithin which are good agents whose detergent actions breaks up plaque and can transfer cholesterol through blood without clogging arteries. They are therefore the good guys and are referred to as good cholesterol. The higher the levels, the better for health.

Recent studies have shown that people with big hips and trim waists
( pear shaped) have higher levels of HDL than people with pot bellies,( beer bellies,rich man's belly) apple shaped. Refer back to METABOLIC SYNDROME. This shows why females generally live about eight years longer than men. The higher your HDL, the lower your chances of developing heart disease.

To be continued-----

Triglycerides, Saturated vs Unsaturated fats, Mono vs poly unsaturated fats, Trans-Fats, Cholesterol levels, cooking oil---coming next.

TILL DEATH DO US PART- - - - ---and somebody to lean on.

My parents, pictured after the church service where they renewed their vows at the celebration of their sixtieth wedding anniversary on Christmas eve, 2005.
I just thought about them as their anniversary
draws near again.
( I look a lot like my Pa, actually like his mother, I was told) When I was little, people would tease him saying---- I gbolu nwa gi nke a n'onu) Also got his carefree nature and keen sense of humour.

Watching my parents, Joseph and Mercy Odunukwe at the celebration of their 60th wedding anniversary, I couldn't help but grasp the full meaning of the phrase----- till death do us part. There we have these two, who have been around each other for so long that they can read each other's body language and most probably mind. At ninety three years old at the anniversary celebration my father looked sharp in his suit.

He had married sixty years earlier after putting in years at Dennis Grammar School Onitsha. He is most likely the oldest surviving old boy. Then it was to Awka College and then to Umudike College of Agriculture. He was finally ready to settle down. He married his best friend's cousin, Mercy Onyemelukwe, a shy but strong willed school teacher who was still nursing the grudge of not being able to attend Elelenwa girls school which had accepted her but there were no funds. She was not really thrilled about getting married but that was what she was supposed to do. Her sisters still tell stories of their anxiety over the possibility of her not showing up at the wedding and their big sigh of relief when they heard her say----"I do." A particular aunt always loves to tell of her surprise at seeing my mother some months after the wedding looking as if she was in the family way, and then she went on to a total of eleven children and being together with Jos, as they call my father, for sixty years.

My parents had embarked on a mission working for the Anglican church all over Igboland, starting from Ihiala, on to the deep riverine areas of Delta State, through Igbodo, back across the river Niger to other parts of Igboland with a service which spanned many decades. My mother stopped teaching to focus on their young children and other children who were for the most part brought to them to be straightened out. She was and is still fast with the whip, more like a drill Sergeant who would rip you up quickly with words and follow with a whipping. My siblings and I always tease her that she was lucky she did all that spanking in those days and not in today's setting especially in America and the civilized world, she would probably be sitting in jail somewhere. We remain very grateful though, for the strict discipline and the way she drilled fractions and grammar into us whether we liked it or not. My mother would with- hold lunches until the owners finished every chore or bookwork she assigned to them and if anybody tried to play tough, she would give the food away to the bunch of " Oliver Twists" who would gladly grab it and devour it. When one of my brothers had too much trouble with long division and fractions, she kept him home from school until he learned his fractions and long division and today he is in a profession where he works with numbers on a daily basis.

While she worked the home front, my father worked as the Headmaster and Agricultural officer for the church districts they served. In addition to their work, they assisted the church Pastor and his wife in their duties. This meant that the life of the family rotated around church, school and farm and life was always busy and it was always all hands on deck. Everything was every body's business. Everybody looked out for each other despite the fights and sibling rivalry. Everybody was in every body's business. For my parents, the name of the game was team work and they worked very hard together, complementing each other so well that people sometimes termed it weakness on my father's part because he and my mother echo each other and discuss everything and know where each other is and what they are doing at any given time. The trust and openness is simply complete. The openness was extended to the children. Everybody got the respect they deserved, male or female. Being around such calmness and loyalty for so long resulted in people taking it that life goes like that around everybody else, resulting in some rude and hard life lessons. From my observation, my parent's success is from a combination of total openess and trust which built their unspoken love over the years.

Being humans, they each have their faults but they manage to learn how to get around those faults. My father is very laid back. He does not allow things to bother him and my mother takes it as being non chalant about things. When I was younger, I would worry when my father would ask us to get a whip for our mother so she would spank him. I later learned that it was his way of telling her to be quiet after she had talked and whined for too long about something he did or did not do. Even to this day when she goes on and on, he would simply say------" bia j'enu kwatalu nne unu itali, k'opia m." That kind of wraps it up for her. Asking for a spanking was his way of saying he was wrong and he was sorry. Then she would change the subject.

On her part, her carelessness gets to my father sometimes. She leaves things around, losing them and then would turn everything upside down searching. He would stay out of the searching and just mind his business because he may end up being blamed when something else is missing from the pile made from the previous search. Each time I go home, I help my mother straighten her room, but before I leave it would be like a beehive again and she functions very well in there, actually I think she functions better that way.She is not dirty or anything like that. She just likes having her clothes, shoes, headties, handbags, books and everything else on the bed, table and chairs in her room. She would actually plead to a helper to leave things where they are because she knows where everything is. It is always a search for the record books of the various women's meetings she serves as secretary and for some other documents she keeps for them. In a hurry to find these things, she would dump the suitcases and drawers in her room on her bed for a quicker search. My father would look in there, scratch his head and let her be until she was done searching and straightening things up. His room, adjacent to hers is the exact opposite with everything set up just like his days as a teacher, his office was always orderly.

In old age, they seem to be depending on each other's strength more than ever. She is stronger physically now and he relies a lot more on her and she takes care of him very well. He helps as much as he can both in and outside the house. In the mornings, he would get his exercise by going out and around the compound to gather yellow cassava leaves and other leaves to feed the goats and then give them water. The activity helps keep him physically fit for his age. While he is doing this morning chore, she makes him breakfast. He is still stronger emotionally, still not letting anything bother him or interfer with his sleep. I have never heard this two tell each other----" I love you." but each time I am around them, I hear it in every move they make. They don't even think about it but it's all there and I just watch in awe. I always remember the promise-----till death do us part--- and I pray that the good Lord will watch over and hold whichever of them is left behind until the end of the journey. That God will be that Somebody to lean on.

METABOLIC SYNDROME------INSULIN RESISTANCE-----SYNDROME X-------PRE-DIABETES= BAD NEWS.

A re- posting from April 2006:


Body shape can mean a lot in the overall health of an individual. Fat distribution around the body varies in people and in the same token spells the difference in health and quality of life. Medical researchers have found that body shape plays a significant role in a person's health. They describe two body shapes: Apple and Pear. Being plump around the middle (apple) and being plump around the hips (pear).There is a world of difference between the two. Whatever it is called, spare tire, love handles, pot belly, beer belly, it is shaping up to be a big risk factor for one of the deadliest health issues today. Having an apple shaped figure puts you at risk of developing Metabolic syndrome.

METABOLIC SYNDROME:
If you are plump around the middle, have high blood pressure, abnormal cholesterol, a tendency toward high blood sugar and slothy habits, you might have Metabolic syndrome.

Metabolic syndrome, Insulin resistance syndrome, Pre-diabetes, syndrome X, or the deadly quartet, Metabolic syndrome is not really a disease in itself, rather it is a cluster of related symptoms that greatly increases diabetes risk by up to five fold, and hardening of the arteries (atherosclerosis and cardiovascular disease) by up to three times . There is more than one cause of metabolic syndrome, and the seriousness varies from individual to individual. The more components of the syndrome that one has, the greater the risks to their health. Women make up to a quarter of those with metabolic syndrome.
There is on going debate whether metabolic syndrome is an actual medical condition or if more understanding is needed before it can be diagnosed and treated.Metabolic syndrome is more common among Black people and Hispanics.

Lifestyle and Risk Factors.
Life style factors play a huge role in whether a person develops metabolic syndrome, so do genetics. Consuming foods high in saturated fats and cholesterol and inactivity put one at greater risk. Increase in age also increases one's risk for metabolic syndrome.More than half of people 60 and over fit the picture for having the syndrome.


Maintaining a healthy body weight is something Americans ( which now includes us) struggle with on a daily basis. Some people struggle with various diets and some get discouraged and give up. With unhealthy food beckoning from every angle coupled with inactivity and lack of exercise many people drag around pounds they have no business carrying.
Research has shown that the body's 24 -hour internal clock, which regulates sleep and hunger, plays a very important role in healthy weight maintenance.
A recent study published in the Journal, Science showed that a faulty or misaligned body clock can wreak havoc on the body and its metabolism, increasing the risk for obesity and diabetes and putting a person at risk for metabolic syndrome. Night shift and odd shift workers should take note of this. Getting enough sleep and exercise should not be taken lightly.

Avoid by all means having any of the components of metabolic syndrome. If you already have any, work hard to eliminate them and prevent developing new ones. The best prevention is a healthy lifestyle, which includes adequate physical activity and a HEALTHY diet.

Some hints:
1. Thirty minutes of moderately intense exercise like brisk walking, bicycle riding (even stationary) most days of the week helps.Walking up and down the steps several times a day will help.Consult your doctor if you already have any issues before embarking on any exercise program. Small weight losses of 10% over a year will improve one's health.

2.Eat foods low in saturated fats, trans fats,cholesterol,sodium and sugar. Some of our Nigerian diet are very high in cholesterol.
If you smoke, STOP as soon as possible. Smoking has been shown to increase Insulin resistance and worsen the impact of metabolic syndrome.

In addition to lifestyle changes, your doctor may recommend medication for instance high cholesterol will call for statins to bring your cholesterol levels down.For high blood pressure, anti hypertensives such as diuretics, (ACE) angiotensin converting enzyme inhibitors, calcium channel blockers and beta blockers can be used.
One may be asked to take low dose aspirin daily to reduce the chances of clot formation which may lead to stroke and heart attack. People with pre diabetes and diabetes may get metformin and other drugs (Thalizolidinediones) which are used to decrease insulin resistance.

Many of us do not visit the doctor unless we become too sick to function. This is very unhealthy and dangerous. Annual physicals and visits to a doctor is a must. Heaven helps those who help themselves.

Cut back on FOOD and ALCOHOL. Avoid fast food for yourselves and your children. EXERCISE! EXERCISE!! EXERCISE!!!. Take brisk walks together as a family especially if the children have weight problems. Monitor your blood pressure regularly. Most drug stores and supermarkets have free self screening machines available. Take your daily vitamins.
First and foremost: Pay a doctor a visit and discuss all of the above.
For more nformation go to these sites http://www.diabetes.org/http://www.americanheart.org/vytorin.com
National Institutes of Health: http://hin.nhlbi.nih.gov/


Practical suggestions for everyday situations extracted from the write up above are as follows.

1. Having a pot or beer belly is a very bad thing. It shows you may be in the early stages of diabetes,may be very overweight, may have high cholesterol which may make your blood vessels block and make you have a stroke or heart attack.
The condition may make you resistant to insulin which your body creates naturally to breakdown sugar and the result will be you having high blood sugar.
Your blood pressure may also be on the high side because you are carrying around too much weight which makes your heart overwork itself with disastrous effects.
Your sex life may be affected too by these conditions.
Over eating and eating food high in fat (trans fat) bad fat and too much drinking of alcohol lead to this condition.

Having a BIG BELLY is not a sign of wealth, rather it is a sign of ill health and impending early death or disability. Cut back on fatty food, red meat, alcohol and fried food and eat more proteins, vegetables, chicken, fish ( the things village folks ate in days gone by). Eat to moderation.
AVOID USING OLD OIL for frying.

If you already have an apple shape ( BEER BELLY), are overweight (fat) and have high blood pressure, high blood sugar or one or more of those, you can improve things by changing things today---- loose weight, exercise, reduce alcohol intake and stay in touch with your doctor
There are different medications to help which the doctor will prescribe, but the most important thing is to understand the seriousness of Metabolic Syndrome and do something about it.